Ever have moments in your day where you wonder how you got to this point in your life? Is this it? Am I destined for more or is this my life? Why do I feel so disconnected from everything and everyone?
Too often we go through life like this, in a perpetual state of auto-pilot. Life becomes Groundhog Day and starts to feel like something that just “happens” to us. We try to manage our health, relationships and careers in a world that offers more and demands more and we question when, if ever, we get off this hamster wheel.
Why am I so disconnected?
Well there may be a few reasons. Technology could be one. Looking at our phones is an automatic response for many of us, It’s the FOMO that comes with social media, emails and the latest cat video. But our tendency to check our devices is habitual, even when we don’t need to, when we’re waiting 1.5 minutes for our coffee, when our minds wander during lunch, when a stressful thought enters our mind — we seek solace in disconnection. But it’s too easy to blame technology.
We’ve all spoken to someone at work, at home or during our day, who we know is mentally somewhere else. Not fully engaged in the conversation but there all the same. Maybe they’re thinking about what to eat for lunch or remembering the bills that they have to pay or perhaps they are working through their own emotions. But they’re not there and you know it, they probably do too. This person could even be you, from time to time.
The reality is we live in a world where innovation promises to keep us more up-to-date and connected, but why do so many of us feel the exact opposite? We experience life the same way we experience a drive to visit our parents, not knowing what we did and how we got there. But we’re there. Along the way missing moments of connection to the world around us, each other and ourselves.
But we got there, right?
When was the last time you had a truly deep and meaningful conversation? Or the last time you felt truly at ease waiting for your coffee by yourself?
Begin to reconnect, now.
What if there was a way to feel more connected in our lives? To the people we share it with, to the jobs we have, the seemingly meaningless interactions with strangers and more importantly to ourselves.
There is a way. It’s called presence. Being here, right now. Body and mind. When we are present we find more meaning in our day-to-day experiences, this allows for moments of clear recognition. We can truly be with our loved one, not physically but emotionally. We can actually taste our food
“Suppose I hold a leaf in my hand. What do you see? A leaf is a leaf; it is not a flower. But in fact, when we look deeply into the leaf, we can see many things. We can see the plant, we can see the sunshine, we can see the clouds, we can see the earth. We’re not the same as, nor are we separate from, other beings. We’re connected to everything, and everything is alive.” - Thich Nhat Hanh
When we pause on our daily walk and notice the sounds of the birds or the rustle of the flowers in the wind, we reconnect back to nature, our environment. When we listen, instead of waiting to respond to our friends we connect to each other.
And when we realise our minds have drifted to a memory of a painful experience or towards anxiety of something to come, and compassionately bring ourselves back to the here and now, we connect to the present moment. And the present moment is where all the magic happens.
It’s this space where we realise that we don’t need to add anything or take anything out of this moment to feel whole.
We were never disconnected — we just weren’t present.
I invite you to take the time today to pause. Notice where you are, the sounds that touch your ear, without clouding this moment with judgement or ideas, simply notice. The sounds, the smells, the feelings. Remind yourself that you are part of all of this. That you are present and connected, here — now.